I was checking out some funny t-shirts the other day (thanks to Biggie T for the website) and I came across this one. I think it’s just awesome, but it got me to thinking about marriage. My boyfriend and I are not married and as we’ve been living in sin lo these many years I have come to several conclusions regarding the exalted institution.

Marriage is cool, but it really has nothing to do with god. Most of my friends are married and I can tell you that many of their receptions were, well, not holy. For them and for many, many people these days marriage is that thing you do when you realize you don’t want or need what anyone but your special someone is selling. Some people will tell you that to be truly committed you have to swear your love before god. That’s retarded. Assuming that your god knows all, doesn’t he already know how you feel? Is he really waiting for an invitation before he gives you his blessing? Come on people, let’s take the g-man out of this and call it what it is: two people excited as hell about each other wanting to tell the world how they feel. Also it’s a great excuse to get shit-faced in front of your family with no apologies necessary.

Marriage is ok for everyone. What the hell do I care who you marry? The government would be better off making it illegal for you to marry that guy who calls you his bitch than making it illegal for you to marry that girl who calls you her partner. There’s no law saying you can’t marry someone with a history of domestic violence who has beat the shit out of his last three wives, so why would there be a law saying you can’t marry someone who loves you and treats you like a queen? No pun intended. It just doesn’t make any sense. If you want to use family values as a platform against same sex marriage then you need to evaluate the partnerships based on those values. The ones that hold up will no doubt be the ones where two people have carved out a nice little existence filled with equity and hopefully the same taste in movies. The only prerequisite should be whether or not you can live happily ever after.

If some folks want to marry the same person and have some kind of crazy ménage a tois lifestyle who are we to say they can’t? It’s fine with me if you think Johnny is scrumptious enough to share with one or two (or 23 in Joseph Smith’s case) other ladies. It’s your bed, people, if you don’t care, why should we?

Let me just wrap this up by saying that if you want to marry your girlfriend or you partner or even somebody else’s partner that’s fine with me, just make sure you don’t invite that cousin who wears black jeans to all the "nice" functions, he’s really an eyesore.

LCK